Things that cheese me off

Figure 1: spoilt brats

i) People who never actually listen to you. They just continue rambling on and on about how tough life is for them. Once, a guy, an ant and i sat chatting. And this guy went on and on , non-stop ( i now wonder how he breathes, because i paid close attention to his breathing patterns and he never once inhaled.


So I came to the conclusion that either:


i) he has big lungs
ii) he 's actually sent to me and the ant to punish us cause we did so many bad things in our past lives that we deserve some kind of sound violation.
That's right: I believe in karma.
)

And he kept on rambling, i saw the ant voluntarily die of asphyxiation. On hindsight, i think it was the lucky one.

Btw: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asphyxia <- if you don't understand asphyxiation. Which reminds me, I first knew of this word from a muse song.





ii) People who listen to music that cheeses me off, thinking its cool to act like that. It's not that I dislike the person individually, but its the act of listening to the music and thinking it's cool that bothers me so much. I have no idea why.

Figure 2: MnM and Ribena

iii) People who voluntarily undergo a never-ending diet and KEEP complaining about how fat they are around people who are obviously fatter than them.These eternal dieters have no firm grasp of the word 'exercise' because the only way for them to slim down is to
i) deprive their bodies of nutrients 
ii) complain a lot. 

Figure 3: the slim girl and the fat ant

iv) Guys who deliberately shrink their balls when they talk to girls and then somehow become a major pain in the ass in front of their other male friends. 


I have no idea why or how they have acquired the skill to shrink their balls at will and speak so softly it hurts to watch( cause i can't hear shit) and turn around and switch a new pair of big golden balls and starts strutting around like a pig on display.
I think they might have some kind of chi-flowing around their bodies, to regulate blood-flow to the ahem..balls.

Figure 4: Ball shrinking abilities 

Next up: Pistol shrimps!